I’ve done a real bad job of remembering to write down all the shit that sucks this week.

So, that shit sucks.

But, here is some shit that has sucked since last Friday.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Having such bad PMS that you feel like it could destroy every relationship you have sometimes.

Political ads on both sides.

The time Newt said he thinks Spanish is the language of the ghetto. I don’t know about y’all, but I’m totally down with some multilingualism! It can only be a good thing!

Oversharing and then regretting it.

Tornadoes.

When your baby decides on a new wake up time. And it’s 4 a.m.

Cutting your baby’s toenails….and accidentally cutting the actual baby.

Getting a notice from your kid’s school that someone in his class has lice.

Having a kid who has hair that’s a louse’s wet-dream.

Getting your ass schooled by old ladies at Jazzercise.

Taking a new medicine moments before Jazzercise and feeling like you may just poop your workout pants.*

Sharing that you are worried about pooping your workout pants on Twitter. See: oversharing.

And, finally, saying something really stupid, out loud and online….

Reader submissions – Gah! You guys had a lot of shit that sucked this week!

Greis: ‎#ShitThatSucks I haven’t seen you this week! (That shit DOES suck, greis)

Jamie Naiser Broach: you promised a park play date soon and never delivered…or you delivered and just didn’t invite me…sucks even more… (Let me explain. I sat up a party in the park, sent out an email to all my girls, and then totally forgot that I set it up. HAVE ANOTHER GLASS OF WINE, ALLISON!)

Kelly Laurence Hill When you’re super sleepy and are ready to crash, but hubby already sleeping and his snoring is so loud you know you’ll never get to sleep….gaaahhhh! (I agree, Kelly! That shit sucks and it’s annoying!)

Missy Walls When I cut an amazing fart and nobody is around to laugh with me. Just kidding. I don’t do that. Ok, yes I do. (We are laughing with you, Missy!)

Charity Jump When your 3 month old throws up everywhere, and you go change him, only to make it down the hall before he throws up all over again.  (I’m so sorry! That’s awful!)

Celina Cortez Serna When you are in the stage of your pregnancy where just look fat and not pregnant:(:( sucks!!! (Yeah, but I bet your boobs look phenomenal!)

Elicia Moore Seawell ‎#shitthatsucks Looking at your paycheck for two weeks worth of hard work/pain in the ass customers and your reaction is “that’s it?”  (I know you aren’t alone!)

Sara Lamont Courser ‎10 week old screaming twins in the backseat for thirty minutes in line at the pharmacy drive-thru only to find out NO PRESCRIPTION. Sigh:(  (Sara, I am getting itchy and stressed out just thinking of that!)

Amy Whitworth Freedman A newborn (who I LOVE) who has his days and nights mixed up so you haven’t slept in two weeks. :/  (THAT SHIT SUCKS, AMY!)

Jennifer Williams I puked in the dentists office.  (That sucks, jen. But it made me laugh for some reason. Does that mean I suck?)

Jennie Potter Johnson having a sweet smell and taste in your mouth since Sunday probably from a cold that is pretty much nonexistent.  (Jenny, are you snorting honey again?)

Barbara Leyendecker Wanting to hug Luca&Leo, but knowing it’ll be another couple of weeks….hmmm, thinking I might have a doctors appt… Forgot all about it, Memo ))  (Awwww, Bibi, that shit does suck. I think you DO have an appointment!)

Jessica Escobar A 6 year old with strep and a 7 month old with ANOTHER ear infection. I feel like I’ve missed half the month of work. GO ME.  (UGGHHH! I hear you sister! It’s been a sick winter for all of us!)

Ashley Evans Mattocks Co-workers who lack basic social skills and the fact that I have to spend valuable energy pretending to give a shit about what they are saying. (I think having wine with me will make everything better.)

Jenna @TheAvasmommy Slipping and falling on my ex MIL’s hardwood floors and making my back hurt like a mofo. (Ouch (I’m sorry!)

Daisy @daisyJD I scratched my car door…on the machine at the gas station car wash. (That shit’s expensive, too!)

zachary phillips @ZacharyAndrewP someone asked me at the salon why I was wearing a “legalize gay” tee, and “oh it’s legal?” w.t.f. (What the fuck is right, Zach! You guys should have shaved that bitch’s head.)

Badasian @badasian grease splatter sucks. (that shit hurts, too.)

I got two more submissions on Twitter. And they both make my shit that sucks look like shit that doesn’t suck at all. I’m not going to put their names here, because I am not sure they want me too. If it’s you and you want to share, let me know and I’ll fix it.

I’m pregnant & was biopsied today b/c it’s likely cervical cancer. Also? A teen rear ended us last night, & no hay ice cream. (I’m SO SORRY you are going through this. I cannot even imagine. I had an abnormal pap and it was scary enough NOT PREGNANT. I’m thinking and praying for you and I know things will be OK! They have to! xo)

Ex-husband coming to town & having to arrange visitation via attorneys? (Ugh. So, so hard. Sending you love. Your kids are so lucky to have you. You are an amazing mom and person. xo)

* * * * * * * * * *

Thanks for stopping by, you guys. It’s so nice to have a weekly place to commiserate about all the shit that sucks.

I love you guys!

Happy Friday!

xo

*For the record, no one pooped their workout pants at Jazzercise. WINNING.